Guide
What to do when your son dies
There is no harder loss than a child, at any age. Be kind to yourself — the practical steps below can wait until you’re ready, and others can help carry them.
At a glance
- Follow the registration instructions for the UK nation where the death happened.
- Begin funeral arrangements and check for a will, prepaid plan or written wishes.
- Use Tell Us Once within 28 days if the person lived in England, Scotland or Wales; Northern Ireland uses separate services.
- Confirm who is authorised to deal with the estate before closing or transferring assets.
Who handles the arrangements
If your son was an adult, his husband, wife or partner may take the lead, and any will he left names an executor. If he was a minor, you as parents will register the death and make the arrangements. Either way, you don’t have to face the paperwork alone.
Ask about support specifically for bereaved parents — organisations such as The Compassionate Friends understand this particular grief.
The first steps that apply to everyone
Whatever your situation, registration comes first. In England and Wales, wait for the medical examiner’s office to confirm you can register, then do so within 5 days. In Scotland, register within 8 days of the death. Northern Ireland has a separate process, normally within 5 days. Order the certified copies you expect to need, then begin funeral arrangements and check for any prepaid plan or written wishes your son left.
Telling people and organisations
If the person lived in England, Scotland or Wales, use Tell Us Once within 28 days of receiving the reference number. It reports the death to HMRC, DWP, the passport office, DVLA and the local council. It is not available when the person lived in Northern Ireland. Banks, private pensions, insurers and household services must still be contacted directly.
Where to go
The official UK services and trusted support for this — so you can act, not just read.
- Register a deathGOV.UK Find and book your local register office, and see what to bring.
- The Compassionate FriendsTCF Support for bereaved parents and families.
- Cruse Bereavement SupportCruse Free bereavement support, by phone and online.
- What to do when someone dies: step by stepGOV.UK The official end-to-end checklist.
- Dealing with an estate in ScotlandScottish Courts Official guidance on confirmation and administering a Scottish estate.
- Probate in Northern Irelandnidirect Official Northern Ireland probate guidance.
Common questions
- Who registers the death of an adult child?
- Usually a spouse or partner if there is one, otherwise a parent or another close relative. Anyone present at the death or arranging the funeral can also register it.
- What happens to his estate?
- If he left a will, the named executor deals with it. If not, intestacy rules apply — a spouse and any children come first, then parents. You may need probate depending on what he owned.
General information to help you find your way — not legal or financial advice. Last reviewed June 2026.